in the village, he met the tortoise. though they often disagreed, and sometimes argued, they became the best of friends. he presided over the tortoise’s wedding, and they raced each other twice.
the guru wrote koans, taught meditation, and oversaw zenterns. he developed the 8-fold system of personalities, and he wrote more than one million haiku. he had many students, but few who took their studies seriously. instead, they played games in the guru’s courtyard.
the guru built his school with a large lōan from the banker. when the guru missed his payments, the banker tried to foreclose on the school, but the guru managed to keep it.
the guru once visited the oracle, and he passed all the trials.
the guru went on two adventures in the village. he climbed to the top of the tall mountain. he ran from the tyger. he argued with a sophist. he once picked a sunflower, but he also raised one in a pot on his desk. he used to celebrate #zenmas.
once, he was put on trial for his beliefs. he was defended by one lawyer, and prosecuted by another. after a disastrous close, he was found guilty and ordered to drink hemlock, which he was going to do until the tortoise talked him out of it.
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