[php]$attach = $_COOKIE[‘attach’];
if (($_COOKIE[‘protracker’] < 8) or ($_COOKIE['protracker'] == 9)) {[/php]
the guru remembered a cabin, but only from a dream.
[php]} elseif ($_COOKIE[‘protracker’] == 10) { // back to life
if (strpos($attach,”mrs tortoise”) == false) {[/php]
the guru walked into the cabin and walked up the stairs and walked down the hallway and opened the door.
inside, the tortoise stood by the fireplace, staring into it.
he turned to the guru, and his eyes were red.
“tortoise,” the guru said, “the Goddess is dead and the world is unraveling. you need to go to sleep.”
“no,” the tortoise replied. “i don’t know what will happen when i fall asleep. everything might cease to exist.”
the guru said, “the alternative is worse.”
the tortoise said, “i can’t risk it. i’m sorry, dear guru. i cannot.”
the guru could see that this was hopeless. he considered returning to the village.
[php]} else {
if ($_COOKIE[‘protracker’] < 11) setcookie("protracker", 11, $cooltime, "/", ".koanoftheday.com");
[/php]
the guru walked into the cabin. he went upstairs. he went down the hallway, and he opened the door.
the tortoise turned toward him and exclaimed, "dear tortoise!"
mrs tortoise said, "tortoise, you have to go to sleep!"
mr tortoise said, "but if i fall asleep, you will cease to exist."
mrs tortoise said, "no, you'll wake up."
mr tortoise said, "what if i'm not with you? when i wake up? what if we never met each other? what if i am all alone?"
mrs tortoise kissed him on the cheek and said, "then come and find me, and we will fall in love all over again."
the tortoise smiled at that.
he said, "okay. i will go to sleep. will you set me on that chair?"
the guru did as the tortoise asked.
[php]}
} elseif ($_COOKIE[‘protracker’] == 8) { // traded
if (!isset($_REQUEST[‘cc’])) { // if p isn’t set [/php]
the guru let himself into the cabin.
the entrance hall was much bigger than seemed possible from the outside of the house. a large staircase stood in the middle of it, leading to a second floor the guru knew could not physically exist.
he was drawn up the stairs.
[php]} elseif ($_REQUEST[‘cc’] == ‘2’) { // up the stairs[/php]
the guru went up the stairs. this adventure had made little sense.
something was deeply wrong with the world.
the guru knew the answer would be at the top of these stairs.
[php]} elseif ($_REQUEST[‘cc’] == ‘3’) { // up the stairs[/php]
the guru reached the top of the stairs and looked around.
he was standing in a long hallway, much too long to exist within the cabin.
at the end of the hall was a giant door.
[php]} elseif ($_REQUEST[‘cc’] == ‘4’) { // up the stairs[/php]
the guru walked down the hall to the door. he put his hand on the doorknob. he knew that when he opened this door, he would learn something about the nature of the universe. something deeply unsettling.
and yet, he had to open it.
[php]} elseif ($_REQUEST[‘cc’] == ‘5’) { // up the stairs [/php]
the guru opened the door and stepped inside.
[php]} elseif ($_REQUEST[‘cc’] == ‘6’) { // up the stairs [/php]
the room was huge. giant windows stood on the far side, looking out over the deep dark woods. nice leather chairs were arranged around a fireplace. in front of the fireplace was a rug.
sitting on the rug was the tortoise.
[php]$_SESSION[‘zenitem’] = “the tortoise”;
$_SESSION[‘zencolor’] = “green”;[/php]
[php function=13]
he looked up and told the guru, “why did you come?”
the guru said, “it was too intriguing not to.”
the tortoise asked, “do you want to know what happened?”
the guru said, “yes.”
the tortoise began.
[php]} elseif ($_REQUEST[‘cc’] == ‘7’) { // the story of the tortoise [/php]
the tortoise said, “last night, as i tried to sleep in my rocknest with mrs tortoise, i stared up at the stars, and a very bizarre thing happened: the stars began to dance. at first, i thought i was going crazy, or hallucinating, because they would dance the way that i wanted them to dance. they would form constellations that i wanted them to form: a giant head of lettuce, me and the mrs kissing, more lettuce, whatever i wanted. and i thought this was strange, but then i imagined the Goddess in front of me, and there she was. she asked me, ‘tortoise, how have you summoned me?’ and i told her that i did not know. she tried to leave, but she could not. she asked me, ‘tortoise, imagine the moon coming down to the earth,’ and i did, and it did. and the Goddess told me what was happening. she said, ‘tortoise, you are asleep, and this world is a dream of yours.’ i asked her what would happen if i were to awake, and she told me that everything would cease to exist. you, her, the village, and worst of all, mrs tortoise.”
the guru said, “i do not believe you.”
the tortoise grinned a sad grin and stared at the guru.
suddenly, the guru lifted above the ground. he looked down at his feet, floating in the air, and said, “okay, now i believe you.”
the tortoise set him down.
“what do we do now?” the guru asked.
the tortoise said, “i cannot fall asleep, guru. you must help me stay awake.”
the guru agreed that he would.
should he sing a song, dance around the room, or sit down in a chair?
[php]} elseif ($_REQUEST[‘cc’] == ‘sin’) { // the story of the tortoise [/php]
the guru began to sing a song.
however, the only songs he knew were soft and soothing, and the tortoise began to drift to sleep.
“guru,” the tortoise pleaded, “this is not helping!”
should the guru dance around the room or sit down in a chair?
[php]} elseif ($_REQUEST[‘cc’] == ‘dan’) { // dance [/php]
the guru began to dance around the room.
the tortoise tried to join him: he lifted one leg into the air, then another, then another, then the last one.
“guru!” he exclaimed. “it’s working!”
the guru began to dance faster.
[php]} elseif ($_REQUEST[‘cc’] == ‘da2’) { // more dancing [/php]
the guru began to dance even faster.
the tortoise did, too.
“i can feel the blood pumping!” the tortoise shouted.
the guru danced even faster.
[php]} elseif ($_REQUEST[‘cc’] == ‘da3’) { // the story of the tortoise
if ($_COOKIE[‘protracker’] < 9) setcookie("protracker", 9, $cooltime, "/", ".koanoftheday.com");[/php]
the guru danced so fast that he lost control of his feet.
he tripped over himself, stumbled toward the window, smashed into it--
and…
[php]} elseif ($_REQUEST[‘cc’] == ‘sit’) { // sit down [/php]
the guru sat down in a chair. this was not entertaining to the tortoise, however, and the tortoise began to drift to sleep.
“help me, guru,” the tortoise pleaded.
should the guru sing a song or dance around the room?
[php]} // end the request check
} // end the protracker check [/php]